Thursday, September 9, 2010

Mud Festivities (Seoul)

It all started on friday afternoon, when all four of us decided to take the two and a half hour bus trip to Boreyong Beach where the Mud Festival was being held. We thought that, even if it was pouring and cold for a july evening, it would be amazing to be there for the first day/opening ceremonies. We woke up at 7 on Saturday morning, had McDonalds breakfast and walked through the thunderstorm to Apgujeong station. Elliott, being our tour guide once again, took us to the express bus terminal two stations away, where we took the ''excellence bus'' for around twenty dollars a head. We bought Krispy Kreme Doughnuts (original, of course), our beloved fermented rice wine, and played silly camp games the whole way there. Thank god we were in the back so we were only annoying half the people on the bus. After being obnoxious and annoying for an hour and a half, we all suddenly fell fast asleep for the last half hour of our ride. When we woke up, it seemed like we were in a different country altogether. Everything was green, everything was surrounded by mountains and the ocean. Things were a quarter of the price, people spoke absolutely no english, damn, it was the real Korea! As soon as we got off the bus we realized that;
1) We clearly did not come prepared. It was fucking freezing. We only had brought our bathingsuits and a flimsy pair of shorts. We didn't think about it being so windy since we were near the waterfront. We had only brought our money, cigarettes, and disposable camera's all in a communal ziplock bag.
2) The mud festival was filled with all of the people I was trying to get away from in North America; the drunk frat boys, the obnoxiously loud westerners, the bitchy jealous white girls. We were constantly being harassed, especially as we were clean. Gross tourist men would rub their disgusting muddy bodies all over ours (''you're too...CLEAN!!!!''), girls would say things like ''where did your boobs go?''. We decided after all of this, we had to fit in and get fucking dirty! So we go to this area where everyone basically picks up mud from the floor and whips it at each other. It was all fun and games until people started whipping us in the face. I'm surprised no one got hurt, since there were rocks in the clay. I lost my flip flops twenty minutes in. It was really, really annoying. We then looked around and found all of the mud slides promised on their official website, but they all had lineups no shorter than two hours longs. Think of Disney World, except while you're waiting in line, people are pouring booze over your head, slapping mud on your ass, and all the while you are so freezing because you thought it would be a great idea to not bring any dry articles of clothing after you jumped into the ocean to clean off.
What's a group of girls (and one guy) to do to stay away from crazy foreigners, keep dry and stay warm? DRINK SOJU IN THE FOOD TENT! Elliott, obviously always finding himself into the center of attention, started playing the communal piano and everyone started roaring with excitement and all praised him and started lining up to play with him. We met some alright foreigners from New Zealand and the states, and chilled with them for a long while at our table. The girls and Elliott ate five hamburgers and fries, we all drank, OF COURSE, way too much and ended up, as usual, drunk. At around nine we decided it was warm enough to go swimming again. Bad idea. We were freezing and drunk and all decided it was now time to catch the bus home. We walked to the bus station and kept asking people where the bus was, but no one understood us. No signs were in English and finally, this one man said that we had missed the last bus going anywhere. All of the other tourists were either staying in hotels or catching a chartered bus back to Seoul. Oh, fuck....FUCK! We didn't have enough money for a hotel, we were soaked, dirty, and tired. We started freaking out (except for Elliott, of course). We started walking around trying to find a hotel that was cheap, but everywhere was booked up (this poor city lives for the two weeks of festivities to pay rent for the rest of the year). There were mosquitos everywhere (I got thirty-two. I counted). Being stupid drunk idiots, the only idea that came to our head was to hitch hike back to Seoul. Everyone laughed at us when we said we wanted to go to Apgujeong. Finally, these three young guys picked us up and said they were driving us to the bus station. Climbing in, it felt like a clown car; five of us in the back, two in the front. I wasn't too scared to hitch hike because I knew Elliott would take care of us, and that Asian people are usually very nice to pretty foreigners (I had read it in a book). They told us the buses were done running anywhere for the night, and that they knew a hotel we could stay at. They bought us all coffee, one of them called his qife who spoke english to talk us through what was happening, bought Elliott shoes because he lost his in the ocean somewhere, and drove us to the ''hotel''. This is where things got fucking weird. We say our thank-you's and goodbye's, and we go inside. No one spoke english, but as soon as we got in, they seperated us from Elliott, gave us towels and prison-type uniforms and brought us to this locker room. I was getting freaked out until we saw dozens of naked asian women bathing in A SPA WATER WORLD!!!! There was tree sap pools, massage tubs, lukewarm springs, you name it! We stripped naked and jumped in like Totoro stylez, getting told off for not washing ourselves in the single showers first. It was the best experience I have ever had, especially after a fucking mud fest! After we got all relaxed and cleaned, we put on our prison pyjamas and wondered if this was actually a place to sleep. Meeting back up with Elliott, we all go upstairs and this epic place just never ceased to amaze us; it was a Korean family style night spa!! There was a huge main room, and about ten different mini rooms with each a different theme. The ice temple room (the whole thing was made out of ice), the salt room (huge salt rocks on the boiling floor), the oxygen room (that gave us a head rush), the list goes on...let me tell you, I have never felt more relaxed in my entire life. it felt like a dream. I could go on and on, but I will just conclude by saying we all slept on the floor with mats and strangers, feeling more safe and sound than I have ever been. We woke up feeling like a million bucks, took another run at the hot springs, dried our clothes on the amazing rooftop in the sun, and found our way to the bus station. Passed out, woke up in Apgujeong and got a huge slap from Korea reality - great, back to the moldy smelly model basement.

No comments:

Post a Comment